Once our annual holidays were genuine Holy Days. The days when you downed tools and headed for church. Extra Sundays. Now you are more likely to head for the bar, the beach, the backyard or the sofa! This is a suggestion of new and alternative holidays that we could celebrate instead of the sad, tired and irrelevant bunch of dates we are stuck with now. Clearly the regular holidays have lost their meaning. So what if we got honest and just decided that Christmas was now really Wastemass? When we gift rubbish and argue with relatives? How about a day instead for a Food Fight? Or New Year's Peeve when everybody has a good grumble and gets it over with? There's a stack of potential festivals here, some already clebrated in some places and some from my foetid imagination.